The Parable of the Fedora

On March 20^th, 2009 I went into American Eagle to take advantage of the “15% Off” deal they give when it’s the week of your Birthday. As I was looking at the new spring selection of stripped and solid color Polo’s a plaid hat caught my eye. I walked over and stared at the hat, not daring to pick it up, for fear of what the sales associates might think. In my mind I imagined the girl working at the checkout counter warning all the other employees (through those ear pieces they all wear) that someone who wasn’t trendy enough to buy a fedora was getting a little too close for comfort. I then decided that there was no way I could “pull off” that hat. It wasn’t my typical sense of style, I would never actually dare wear it in public and if I did dare wear it people would mock me. I went back to looking at more medium sized polo’s until I found myself back with the fedora.

I decided I would try it on, but there was no way I would try it on out in public (even though this was at the Cache Valley Mall and it is always empty). So I grabbed a medium vintage fit polo and the fedora and headed to the dressing room. After trying the hat on I figured I really couldn’t pull it off in any normal public setting, but perhaps during the summer at efy I could wear it for games night (“Games Night” is the one time during the week Counselors are allowed to wear hats). Still unsure of my ability to “pull it off” I took a picture of myself wearing the hat in the dressing room and sent that picture in a text message to Jill Catts asking for her thoughts. Thankfully I didn’t have to wait in the dress room too long before Jill replied back. After receiving a positive response from Jill and taking into account the fact that at efy I would be the Counselors boss, and since most people would want to be on good terms with their supervisors I didn’t feel Counselors or youth would openly mock me if I wore the hat. As I approached the checkout counter I was sure the cashier would question me about the hat… Strangely she rang it up as if it was completely normal for someone like me to buy a hat like that; perhaps she figured I was buying it for some trendy person who could “pull it off”. I tucked the hat away until its big debut at efy, once again I was pleasantly surprised that no one questioned my ability or right to wear the fedora. Since that time I have purchased several more fedoras and even wear them in normal public settings such as going to the library or shopping. Therefore what? So I can wear a “Fashion Hat” in public and not be overly concerned with what people think…

I think one message that can be gained from my experience with the plaid fedora it that you can “pull off” more than you think… And I’m not just talking about style. Often times in different social settings I remain quite or in the background because I often don’t believe I can “pull off” the happy, outgoing, kind and caring person that I would like to be. I worry that people will think I’m just being fake, or that I’m really “trying too hard”, or that it just isn’t me. Yet whenever I have stepped out of my comfort zone to be the kind, caring and outgoing person I desire to be I never regret it… The only regret I have is not doing it more often. So the next time you hesitate to do something good simply because you are worried that you won’t be able to “pull it off” or you get worried about what others might think… Just think of how great I look in my Fedora… And step out of your comfort zone, not worrying what others might think! (And if you don’t think I look good in my Fedora… Step out of your comfort zone anyway.)

Thanks for a good time ’09… You have a lot to live up to Twenty Ten

Without a new “High School Musical” movie debuting on the Disney channel or in theaters one may think 2009 would have been a year doomed to mediocrity. Thankfully for me ’09 was a very good year… I want to list just a few “Lessons Learned” in 2009:

The first few months of the year I spent a good amount of time planning and preparing for my last summer with efy. As with every year efy was a blast. This summer was special for many reasons, the team, the counselors, the youth, the numerous miracles and so many other things made me feel very good about how my career with efy ended. It’s slightly weird to no longer be an active part of efy. Over the last five years I have put a large amount of my time and effort in hopes of helping to improve the program and those who would be a part of that program. Now I’m left with a lot of brightly colored polo’s that I will never have the desire to wear in public and that I don’t have the heart to throw away… So what is one of the lessons I learned from efy this summer? Oft times I’ve questioned if I can be the type of person that can throw his whole heart into things such as relationships, friendships, a career, etc. My time with efy has clearly illustrated that I can throw my whole heart into those things… It’s just a matter of finding the right fit.


With the passing of Michael Jackson this summer I heard and read many individuals on news programs, the internet and radio stations explain that Michaels passing is a reminder of how fragile life really is, and what really matters most in our lives. In my mind his passing more clearly depicted how fickle people can be. For the past 10 years or so I remember Michael being less talked about for his music career and more for his changing appearance, legal and financial trouble. He had been often mocked by people who would later be singing his praises after his passing. So what’s the lesson? Even if you are the butt of every joke and constantly being mocked today… it’s possible that one day people will be going crazy for you, even crying over you. (And if you are like Michael you might have a seemingly disproportionately large number of Asian individuals crying over you.)

Getting ready for my final year at Utah State Dru Brown and I decided to live in the same apartment… We found a place that already had two other guys in there; we signed the paper work and planned to move in at the start of the school year. On the day we were moving in we found out that our apartment manager had moved Dru and me to a totally different apartment with two individuals we had never met. Understandably I was a little ticked at the situation… it wasn’t what I had agreed to or prepared for, and certainly the manager had to be breaking some law by changing our contract without any forewarning. Yet as the semester progressed I began to have fun and enjoy this group of roommates just as much, if not more than any I have had. (And if you know how old I am you understand that I have had a lot of roommates.) Therefore what? Even when you have every right to be ticked that things didn’t play out as the contract you signed said they would… It might be for the best.

So those are three little lessons from ’09… And what lessons does 2010 hold? I’m not sure but I’m excited to find out…